BADASS
by randomle26
Summary: [IMPLIED RIVAMIKA ONE SHOT] Being badass doesn't mean riding your motorcycle and running it into you're teacher's car. Being Badass doesn't mean doing drugs in the back of the school without getting caught. So what does being badass really mean?


**AN: Here's another very short one shot with Modern!AU.**

**I actually have a really long one shot planned, but I thought this one would be a good one for my second submission. Also, the RivaMika is implied.**

**Ignore thy errors please and you shall enjoy (I hope).**

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Jean Kirstein leaned against the _Ms. Pac-Man_ machine as Marco Bott was feverishly pushing buttons as if his life depended on getting the high score.

Jean lightly flicked the toothpick dangling from his mouth- his imitation cigarette- as he people watched the inside of the Arcade. Whenever he saw some cute girls, he would wink at them before they would glare at him and turn away with their younger siblings. Jean then realized he needed to lay off the wink- or what Marco called the Twitch.

"Are you _done_ yet?" Jean whined, "I need to head to the grocery store. Pick up something for dinner." With his parents being at some party all night, that meant frozen chicken wings and microwaveable pastas.

The machine let out a dejected noise, causing Marco to yell in anger. He looked over and saw his friend's irritated look and said, "Fine, we'll go."

The pair left the Arcade and headed to the nearest grocery store, ironically the one closest to Jean's house. Standing there in the frozen section, Marco couldn't help but regret not bringing his hoodie.

The sudden jolts by his friend made Jean drop the bag of frozen chicken nuggets.

"What the heck, man?" the angry teenager hooted at his friend.

Marco just stared in awe across the isle and said, "Levi's here!"

"We need to hide why?" Jean asked when Marco pushed him into a random isle.

Marco shushed his friend, peering over the side to see if "he who must not see us" was still there.

Jean, really to mock, looked over too. Indeed, the older boy was in the dairy section. The subject of both Marco and Jean's attention soon turned on his heels and headed into another direction.

"Why do you think he's here?" Jean asked, "You think he's selling drugs?"

Marco rolled his eyes, "I guess _yogurt_ could be considered drugs. What's the matter with you?"

Jean smirked, "I guess you're right. Levi's a badass, but he's not that badass."

Marco slapped his friend on the side of his head, "Selling drugs isn't _badass_, Jean, it's stupid and reckless. And Levi's _more_ badass than you are."

"What?" Jean exclaimed, "Levi is not! He's just a wussy, wimpy poser. He's-"

"He's waiting for you to move your ass out of the way."

Jean and Marco turned around to see Levi with his arms crossed against his chest, a basket of groceries in one hand. He didn't look too happy- but with that stoic look on his face, how could anyone really tell.

"Sorry man," Marco apologized, pulling Jean with him while he backed away.

Levi looked over at Jean, "And do you really think I'd sell drugs in the middle of a grocery store?"

It was a good thing Jean was smart and decided not to respond.

Marco and Jean watched as Levi began scanning the isle for his desired product. It was then did they realize that they were in a specifically _grotesque_ section of the grocery.

Tampons and menstrual pads mocked them everywhere. This section would've made _A Nightmare on Elm Street_ much scarier.

The two didn't know what they were more confused about: why they hadn't realized they were in this particular section or why Levi was in the section.

Once Levi was finished neatly stacking boxes of tampons in his basket, Jean couldn't help but let slip, "Who are those for? You?"

Levi stood with crossed arms again. He raised an eyebrow and explained, "Mikasa wasn't feeling good, so she asked me to pick up a few things for her."

"But… tampons…they're tampons!" said with multiple hand gestures.

Levi rolled his eyes, "So? My girlfriend needed my help, what's the big deal?"

"Do you know what girls use that for?" Jean asked.

Levi replied, "Do you?"

Jean stuttered, "W-well they… um they… uh…"

Levi turned his back to the two, "Once you grow up, you can tell me the answer," he said cleverly before walking away from the stunned too.

"I would again remind you how Levi is a bigger badass than you," Marco finally spoke up, "but he kind of already did that for me."

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**How was it?**

**I thought it would've been sweet to do a piece about Levi buying tampons for Mikasa, but I didn't want it to be too lovey-dovey.**

**Please Read and Review!**


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